@outlander, this could work out in your favour. A few days of other family members having to look after your Pop may bring home to them just how much care he does need, and how much you do for him. One Auntie and Uncle of mine went into aged care, in a small apartment, but because my Auntie was doing a lot of day to day reminders and little bits of help for my Uncle, even their family didn't realise how severe his dementia had become until she died. He needed constant little reminders of where he was, what time it was, whether he should be eating lunch now etc. All those small things are wearing for the carer, but pretty much invisible to anyone looking on.
There is the real possibility that by underestimating his needs, they may fail your Pop at some point, but again, that's the kind of thing that acts as a wake-up call to how much care is needed. They will be checking him often enough by the sound of it that a dangerous failure is unlikely.
None of this is easy. We went through it with my parents, being able to see they needed help, but as long as Mum refused to accept it, we couldn't do a thing. But at the moment you need concentrate on looking after yourself.
