Skip to main content
Forums Home
Illustration of people sitting and standing

New here?

Chat with other people who 'Get it'

with health professionals in the background to make sure everything is safe and supportive.

Register

Have an account?
Login

cancel
Showing results for 
Search instead for 
Did you mean: 

Looking after ourselves

Re: The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

@Faith-and-Hope  Thanks for the kind wishes. do you play risk? That's a good one. I've always wanted to take over the world. Scrabble is great. 

I like to make up words that don't exist . I give the proposterous meanings. I can never get away with it but it's good for a laugh. i am hopeless at keeping a poker face. I always end up giggling.

Re: The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

@Shaz51 Happy birthday to her. I hope it was ok for you though.

Re: The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

Today I wrote about my parenting successes but I am now writing about my current parenting failure that has caused me to break down tonight. 

 

My son came home tonight devastated that he can’t live like this. My house is a mess as I’ve been working on other stuff. The truth is in the past I would have been completely  out of control in crisis after my day today with lots of stressful things I’d addressed. My ex tipped my emotion levels really high but I’ve managed to pull myself together and keep plodding. 

 

My son is dissapointed and ashamed of me. I can do anything right. I let him down so much. The hardest part is the more I’ve been doing ok the more he is riding me to do better. It’s going to take so long for me to get to a functional independent place and it will still never be enough. I’m hurting and scared and fueled by guilt and shame that I can’t be the mum he wants or needs. 😢😢😢

 

Re: The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

@Teej  .... listen carefully, and please try to take hold of this ..... that is your son’s challenge in life to try to get a hold of, and it’s not on you.  Any one of us busy mums here will put our hand up and say that when the going gets tough and we are making tough inroads in other directions, the house naturally goes to pieces, and instead of standing back and criticising, your son’s place is to get in there with his sleeves rolled up and help straighten up.

 

If he did a load of dishes, put the washing on, and swept the floor, you could start dealing with the rest.  It’s a lesson he needs to learn.

 

Mega hugs incoming .... 💜💕💜💕💜💕💜💕 ..... you’re a star.  Just you keep shining Hon ❣️

Re: The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

@Sweet_cheeks @of you like Scrabble, look for Bananagrams.  It’s sold in a yellow banana-shaped pouch.  Sooooo much fun ❣️

Re: The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

@Teej I have found you on the other thread .....

 

Hugs n hugs .... 💜💜💜💐💕

Re: The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

Thank you @eth  For sharing your story. 

Sometimes I feel I should feel guilty.  Other times I think I'm in a peaceful happy place.  Why disturb that. 

Thanks again. 

Re: The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

Thank you @Teej For sharing your story about your son. 

I think in all reality I was just burnt out from parenting. So it's better he is at my mums. 

We had a nice talk on the phone last night.  Which was lovely. 

Re: The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

@Faith-and-Hope  I'll look out for it.

Re: The Virtual Village - a space for parenting 'stuff'

@Teej HI Teej. I just saw this. It has been hard for you.  I was interested in what you said about gaming and I'm relieved to know I'm not the only one to have a kid punch walls. my son  is seeing a psychologist and it seems to be working well and he is moving out today which will be less stressful for both of us. It is great you have a relationship with your boys. They obviously love you. I think I should have let someone else look after my kids. My sister came to my house once and told me "if you don't get your act together human services are going to take your kids away." At first I was furious but in hindesight  maybe she was right. Things have certainly been chaotic and weird. I have been to hospital a couple of times and had periods of not taking medicine for the usual reasons. I think you had more insight into your situation. I was too proud to ask for help. I was paranoid that people would think I was crazy and take my boys away. They should have. I appreciate you sharing your history of looking after teenage boys. It's helped me not feel so bad. Cheers

Illustration of people sitting and standing

New here?

Chat with other people who 'Get it'

with health professionals in the background to make sure everything is safe and supportive.

Register

Have an account?
Login

For urgent assistance