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Helpmehelpher07
New Contributor

How can I help if she won't let me

Hi there,  now I'm at a total loss as to how I can help my partner,  now she has had a really bad few years with people she loved turning on her and loosing her dad plus a few good friends of hers took there own lives, plus she has a 13year old narsasistic daughter who will do an say anything to hurt her mum, plus running away and staying out instead of being home like she should,  anyway I came to stay with her 3months ago ,the daughter ran off to her 19year old boyfriends place and just lied and did everything she could to make people feel sorry for her. Not doing or listening to anything  her mum asked.anyway she returned home 2weeks ago and was being really good until she wants to do what she wants then she just leaves. And end result was the father who has not looked after his daughter for one night since birth has rang child services on her, now they have to go through it all again  and my partner has had enough of being run into ground and treated like crap by daughter and want as to give up on everything, I will do everything to help but she dose not want to here a word I say just keep saying she don't care and won't be here tomorrow .What do I do. Anyone got any ideas. 

1 REPLY 1

Re: How can I help if she won't let me

Hi @Helpmehelpher07 

 

sounds very frustrating and stressful situation for all involved 

 

If I were in your situation I would try to help your partner learn how to navigate the situation in small chunks and laying down some skills to help her set boundaries with her daughter 

 

She definitely could do with help from a professional councillor psychologist or social worker or somebody who has the ability to help her work out tools and skills and strategies she can put in place or learn to use so that she can make it through these difficult situations and not feel like she has to resort to self harm and or self harm threats to cope 

 

feels like maybe some legal advice re responsibilities to dealing with her daughters behaviour and what she is expected to legally do as a parent might help - is there any social work assistance that may help in the local area ?? Lifeline may have good support resources to suggest for yourself your partner and the daughter - I encourage you to reach out and find out who can help guide you and your partner through  these hard times 

 

hope you find some support 

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