16-03-2015 03:02 PM
My name is Jes and i am 31. For the past 3 years my mother (63) has been living with my wife and i. We have a nice Granny flat at the back of our house for her own space and life.
She has been living with us since she had a break down and been diagonsed with Depression, SocialPhobia and Paranoia. We had her seeing a specialist on medication and in therapy but only lasted a year or so into it. But now things are taking a bit of a turn and im not sure really which way to go.
over the course of the last 2 years she would have "episodes" days where she was convinced someone was making her ears ring to the TV sending secret messages, work colleagues conspiring against her, body parts feeling strange, running out of work in tears to connecting things and evidence of stories that some how made sense to her to justify her actions.
She has been to the police multiple times to complain or investigate if anyone is out there with an app playing with peoples lives via there iphones.
Sereve paranoia of family members, someones playing games, flashing lights, and the worst of all that actually scared me are the voices in her head. the ones that tell her someones coming to "remove" her.
its frightening. and the illness has gone beyond depression and paranoia.
She is now retired and volunteering 2 days a week. Most days she is fine no issues pottering around the garden caring for our dogs, trips to sydney and melbourne with no issues.
She refueses to see doctors or specialists. Wont take medication because she believes that somone is doing it to her so therefore medication is pointless. Has had thoughts of driving away travelling to escape this feeling.
I am out of answers i have tried being firm but we go in circles. i have cried and begged to no result. she has estranged her brother and his family and put strains on my marrage and inlaws. to the point where i dont want to bring her to family events because anything could happen.
i am out of options and not sure what the next step is. We are moving areas in 12 months and my wife and i are happy to take her with us but not if she wont better herself ? but im afraid she wont and she will go off on her own and crash and burn.
i have now found myself worried and concerend like a parent of my mother.
would love some insight.
16-03-2015 06:26 PM
Im Baboo, a moderator here on the forum-
Id like to say first how wonderful it is that your taking care of your mother- What a big job this must be- i can relate on your frustrations on caring for a family member whom does not think they need assistance.
I went to their GP to ask what on earth i could do to intervene, the doctor of course said they couldnt discuss any thing with me unless i had permission or if i was aloud to attend sessions with them. I knew this would never be the case. So i rang Life line aswell ( 13 11 14 ) to get a different opinion- Life line suggested discussing this with other family members to make a plan- sister, brother, Aunt or Uncle- ask if they will come together to help approach this person and tell them " you need more help than what your getting- we love you and your very unwell".
This was just the beginning for my situation any how.
Could you get support from other family members? Can you talk to your mother on one of her good days about how you feel?
21-03-2015 12:30 PM
24-03-2015 12:57 PM
24-03-2015 01:05 PM
25-03-2015 07:14 PM
thank you for your input its always good to hear new information about possible causes / effects. i have tried to push for MRI to try eliminate things. i did have a gut feeling it could be a tumor ( god forbid) but just had a feeling.
i am meeting with her doctor tomorrow to try and get some advice even tho im aware she cant talk about patient confidentiality.
She is booked in to have a cataract removed in the next few months. Her diet is not the best but she is no obese or super skinny nor does she smoke or drink excess alcohol. i would say her diet is basic.
i truly appreciate all feedback.
25-03-2015 08:28 PM
Wishing you all the best with the appointment tomorrow.
The reason why i mentioned diet too was because (you might already know) certain vitamin deficiencies can also cause psychosis type symptoms and particularly in the elderly.
If the MRI doesnt show anything,further tests worth getting (if your doctor will do them) include b12 levels,b1,b2,b3,vitamin D,Methylmalonic Acid,folate,homocysteine.
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