Lived Experience Forum

[bluegirl65]

Hi, im 53 female, and am suffering from depression brought on by a breakup.. The relationship was abusi e and controlling, but only sometimes. Mostly it was really wonderful, but he was on the narcisstic personality disorder spectrum, so sometimes could be controlling and unkind.

  Im really stuggling with adjusting to being single again, im not on antidepressants but am taking St Johns wort, which has helped a fair bit but im still having cycles of up three days, low three days, etc. I just feel so empty and sad without him, even though i know it was not all in all a healthy relationship. Scared i will never feel normal again. I was delressed low grade depression, for 5 years before he came alo g, then 3 years with him, i wasnt ever depressed, then now hes gone im back to being depressed again. Feeling good and strong for 2 to 3 days then see. To go downhill for three days then back up again. Cycles. Does this end? Why the cycles? Thankyou! 😞

[greenpea]

@bluegirl65 Hi bluegirl65 and welcome to the forums. We are about the same age so I kind of understand where you are at. If you think your depression has come back then go and see your gp. He/she could refer you onto a psychologist, there are various packages available through psychologists which bring the costs down. 

It is hard to break up with someone even if the relationship has been far from perfect. However there are many other fish in the sea and putting up with abuse of any nature is not good for the soul you can do better. 

While you are here have a look around the forums there are chat forums and more serious forums. We are all very friendly and don't bite :). Hope to see you again. greenpea

[bluegirl65]

Thankyou!

[aimsanji25]

@bluegirl65 hi bluegirl. first of all. you're at the same age with my mom. so yeah, i feel like talking to my mom. #nooffense hahaha

is it weird that i gave you an advice or share my opinion or smthing like that ?

hahaha

is not easy to get over of something. especially 'bout love.

but yeah it's okay to feelin' "BLUE" and gloomy, or even sad about it. it's a normal thing.

but the thing that you have always know is, there always be someone who can light up your day. EVEN tho it will never change the special one that we had before.

Seriously, i think it's work. if you think that way. 

but yeah, i really want to know the details about ur story 

🙂

sanji

[Sweet_cheeks]

I hope you find a nice guy. They are out there. They may not be glamorous or rich but they are good and you deserve that.  I hope you feel better soon. I would see a psychologist and do some excercise.