19-06-2019 01:17 PM
I have only had a few drinks this year. In fact since February 2018 I have probably had less than a normal person would consume in a fortnight.
I like having a drink but can only do so when I am happy. My lack of drinking has really highlighted how poor my mental health has been for a long time now. It is getting to the point where this has become the new normal. I do not want to continue in this way much longer. It may be time to take an closer look at the garden soon.
I do wonder what if having access to mental health services would make a difference but as that is denied me I guess I will never know.
19-06-2019 06:24 PM
I know you only state you drink when happy, but did you know alcohol itself is a depressant? I drink occasionally myself but know it’s a sign of self sabotage, as I have to not take my meds when drinking and missing them can have dire consequences.
I know you say mental health services have been denied to you, but could you request to see a psychologist under a mental health plan? It offers ten Medicare funded sessions with a psychologist per year. Just a thought.
20-06-2019 03:06 PM
Thanks @Queenie .
Yes I did know that alcohol is a depressant and I have seen others on that spiral. I am not sure why but I do enjoy good quality drinks when I am in a good mood. Nice wines and good spirits (not mixed) can be pleasurable. When I am down even the thought of alcohol will make me feel ill. If that were not the case there is a good chance I would now be dependant on it. It is only lately I have wondered if that is also why my use of antidepressants has been unsuccessful. When I have been prescribed them over the years each time they have had an effect but one which is negative. It is why I will not try them again. I know that those medications would probably push me over an edge, so best avoided.
I have had a Mental Health Plan and saw a local shrink. One who had a very good reputation. My sessions there had some good aspects but seeing someone only limited occasions was not that helpful. Friends have said I really should be admitted for a period but that has always been a problem and now is completely out of the question. The high incidence of tobacco use in the local Mental Health facility and my hypersensitivity means I could not go there. I have also been a patient in that hospital for medical reasons and in a nine day stay I only had a piece of fruit a day. The quality of the food was so poor I would not eat it and the smell would make me nauseous. The nursing staff did send a dietitian and I spoke to them and eventually they agreed that the quality was dire.
It is also the place I used to work and where I acquired my PTSD. Even driving past now makes me feel excessively nervous, so there is no way I could be admitted. That is why I have to be very careful with what I say to any therapist as I made the mistake of being honest once and was taken there as an involuntary admission. I soon worked out what lies I had to tell them to leave and that is a lesson learned. So I now do not have any public health or mental health services available to me.
21-06-2019 10:10 PM
That's really interesting that you've had only a couple of drinks this year @Orwellian, do you feel better overall without the alcohol?
22-06-2019 03:55 PM
No I don't feel better. The distaste for alcohol is due to my feeling so bad. I have never been a big drinker anyway.
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