Hi @Daisies
I can't tell you how I would feel had I done anything to injure myself deliberately in any way but I do know what it feels like to have someone I loved and valued take his own life and it's heart-breaking
After my son had made an attempt he could hardly keep what he had done a secret but "I know about the bear" - any attempt to talk to him about it was met by anger and evasion and being shut out of his pain like that was very hard - and of course he wanted his privacy but a suicide attempt is hardly a private matter - and completion of the act in his case was a huge impact on so many people and many of them teenagers - boys and girls - and in all the years since I have had people approach me to talk about it -
You may feel that people are afraid of you and also - because your husband is talking about it with other people and needs their support - you feel betrayed. That's okay because they are shocked and scared and don't know what to do
Completed suicide in not a private act where the pain ends - it's very public and a lot of people are hurt and that pain will continue for years to come
Okay - I hear you - you want to know what other people have experienced after a suicide attempt - and I am telling you what I experienced when the act was completed. Terrible grief. Immeasable loss. Your life is valuable and unique - you only have this life and there is never going to be someone else like you - you would be depriving the society of your presence and this is terribly sad
I hope you can find some peace - you need to find the value of your own life somehow - I am trying to work out how people have that value - I have it - I know - but I didn't always
The path is rough and tough and I wish you the best on your journey - a journey btw which would cease if you succeeded and I would be sad about that
Please keep going
Dec
