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Former-Member
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The worst feeling in the world...

I’ve had a look on the internet and they all talk about being alone, losing someone... for me the worst feeling in the world is 

... knowing that people love and care for me and want me in their future and I can’t feel it and don’t want to be in this world. 

That for me is the worst, that it is such a conundrum I cannot solve. I want to make sure my loved once are financially secure when I’m gone, but when I think of it they won’t be ok. But I’m also not okay and hate myself for everything I cannot do, I’m disgusted with my body, I feel all negative feelings against myself and just want to disappear.

 

what is the worst feeling for you?

9 REPLIES 9

Re: The worst feeling in the world...

Hi @Former-Member,

Thanks for sharing your post. I'm so glad that you've felt comfortable to reach out to the SANE community and share your feelings. It sounds like your struggling with some difficult thoughts at the moment. I will be sending you an email shortly to check in.

Moonstone

 

Re: The worst feeling in the world...

I think for me it's similar to you. The worst feeling for me are those times when I'm stuck in my head and can't see anything positive. I can't see anything to look foward to. Even though I have a happy healthy family around me. And for me, that is the most full on thing about my mental illness. 

 

When I'm on the other side of those bad times, I look back and just find it quite incredible that I was so stuck. But when I'm stuck - I'm seriously stuck. 

 

Thanks for sharing and I'd love to keep chatting if you're keen to. I'm just starting to get a hold of my head and talking to other people helps me learn more about me. 

 

 

Re: The worst feeling in the world...

@Former-Member  I hate my body .... what the medications have done to my body I loathe.

Re: The worst feeling in the world...

hi @Former-Member 

I try to selfishly focus on my health & wellbeing each day.

It is much easier to focus on others' needs. But I try to focus on myself each day. I try to eat well each day (though sometimes I don't succeed & eat a bunch of sugar) and I try to exercise each day. Becuase even though I sometimes don't want it, I have a physical body that needs repair and maintenance everyday. Just like a car or other machine does. 

It's a big responsibility, my body, but I try my hardest to look after it each day - to shower, to wash my hair, to brush my teeth, to floss, to launder my clothes, to make my bed, to feed myself nutritionally. It is hard and some days I don't reach every goal but I try to and if I miss a day, I try to meet that goal the next day.

@greenpea  what has happened to your body, is it weight gain? I had weight gain and increased risk to diabetes on a med so I insisted to my pdoc that I change meds becuase that was not ok with me.

Re: The worst feeling in the world...

I love your attitude to taking care of the physical body no matter what's going on in your head - I have learnt to do this too, drag myself to the gym, have a shower, brush my teeth, try to eat some good foods every day. It really does help.

Re: The worst feeling in the world...

@BryanaCamp 

 

Hello.

 

I will try work on my mental and physical health as best as I can. The 'worst feeling' is not leaving me, but I'm trying every day. I'm not sure if I want or do not want to lose this battle, there have been too many battles.

Re: The worst feeling in the world...

hang in there @Former-Member and let us know how you are going. sitting with

Re: The worst feeling in the world...

Hanging in there, lost and confused.

How are you @BryanaCamp ?

Re: The worst feeling in the world...

hi @Former-Member sorry to hear you're struggling.

 

I'm having an ok day, I need to go to an appointment soonish but here for  15 mins if you want to talk. I just heard that my brother is in a locked psych ward overseas and he is hating everything about it, so I'm feeling very frustrated about that. Apart from that I'm having an ok day, have been quite productive.

 

What are you up to today?

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