panic attacks and asthma

[Aussie]

As much as i see good in this reply i also see some issue that the OP may not want.

let me get this right ...In order for the OP's husband to understand better she should lie to him ? what happens then when / if her labido drops due to AD's and the husband is none the wiser.. all of a sudden you have a very real issue on your hands..

I totally understand the husband may be overwhelmed but i personally think keeping him the dark will only elongate a matter that really needs to be addressed for the family to move forward, adding lies and deceit to the mix along with depression is a receipe for distaster as what is a relationship without trust ?

please don't think i am having a dig here as that is not the intention, it is more to bring to light the negative side to your suggestions which i think is just as important to the OP.

[pip]

@Aussie. I understand where you're coming from. I didn't actually mean she should lie to him, all I said was tell him (for now) that she has to take a vitamin tablet. Once he sees she is responding to the AD's then she can let him know why she is feeling better and what good the AD has done. If she has problems adjusting to the AD's, there is nothing stopping her from asking hubby to take her to the Dr for some advise. Some men need educating as to the necessity of AD's, I used to ask my ex (occasionally) to drive me to the Dr's, I would tell him I felt tired or shaky. Like OP's hubby, mine was totally against AD's or any form of MI. He would actually delight in teasing me. As I adjusted to the AD's, I started ignoring his rubbish and through counselling (that he was unaware of) I became emotionally stronger. It took time, yes, months, but with help, it is possible. Unfortunately when you're dealing with someone who refuses to accept emotional problems, quite often you have to resort to subterfuge. I don't agree it is the right thing, but what are the alternatives, if spouse refuses to accept?

[Aussie]

@pip I get what your saying mate, me being a male with MI i may not be the right person to respond as it's quite bias or maybe i have no substance to go on, as we know, MI is something that is with you for the long and short of it so i feel addressing these matters asap is only best but i am neither married or have children so i feel i am out of my depth giving you an answer here.

as for how to educate him ? well for me being a PTSD sufferer it's easy, i can sit down and explain depression on a manly level and most do get it (or don't have the balls to say they don't in front of me) we have to change up the avenue of approach sometimes to get the infomation to stick, but if he loves you... he will listen and support you and as hard of a convosation that is to have.. it may just need to be had.

[pip]

@Aussie. Trying to explain MI to a non-believer or someone who simply doesn't 'get it', is like trying to re-educate someone using a foreign language. It's hard enough for the sufferer of the illness, trying to explain it is 'mission impossible'. The old saying: you can lead a horse to water etc. Once you start taking AD's regularly, then you can get your spouse to listen because you start explaining how bad you felt, then, how much better you're feeling. Spouse might initially comment that the problem was 'in your head', where else IS MI? I suffer a mild form of PTSD, so I understand your problem, The nightmares, the panic when you feel 'trapped'. Most people who deny MI, or PTSD usually suffer a mild form of depression, but to deny it, they make themselves believe they're stronger because they deny the need for help. Strength only comes with admitting you need help, the longer you deny you need help, the lonelier you feel, because only you know you need help. It's a vicious circle when you constantly deny.