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Looking after ourselves

Senior Contributor

what’s in your tool box?

Hi everyone 

I’m after some more suggestions. 

I have a small coping box which includes - walking, using the forum, out in the garden, listening to music. 

I don’t have much motivation. 

What do you do when you are not coping? What do you do when you’re overwhelmed and need something to move that feeling. 

Sometimes I don’t even think of using a coping tool because my feelings are just too much. 




Re: what’s in your tool box ?

Hi @BlueBay ,


They are all good things to have in your toolbox.  There is a thread about this which you might find useful.  I've tried to put the link in below.  Fingers crossed it works for you.  Smiley Happy


Mine is pretty similar to yours.  I have colouring in  books, hand cream, spa and sauna and a few other bits and pieces.

Re: what’s in your tool box ?

Great suggestions @Gazza75 

thanks 😊

Re: what’s in your tool box ?

Your welcome @BlueBay , I think its really beneficial to consider and think about this stuff and be as prepared as you can be.  There are lots of great ideas and suggestions in the thread. 


I wrote a little bit about building resillience that I can try and find for you if you like.  


I've done a course at work on it and also some stuff from more recently.

Re: what’s in your tool box ?

 hey @BlueBay 

you might get some more ideas from this thread Got a coping strategy that you find good? Share it here Smiley Happy 


for me i find findawords, drawing/painting, crochet, my worry box, funny tv shows, or showers helpful. 

some people like bubbles, doing their hair or nails, hand or foot massages with a nice smelling moisuriser, or stress balls quite helpful. 

Re: what’s in your tool box ?

Hi @BlueBay @outlander @Gazza75 

For me at the moment water tai chi in a heated pool twice most weeks is the number one thing that's working.  It takes away all thoughts other than doing it and really puts me in a zen zone afterwards.

I also lie down, close my eyes and focus on my breathing, slowing it down and making it deeper.  Often I manage to zone out for 10 minutes or so if I do it for a while.  I try to do this most days mid afternoon. 

I recently had a panic attack and you're right BlueBay it's hard to remember what works in that moment, but I am finding I do my breathing sooner and calm down sooner after many years of knowing the theory.

Other things I do that make me feel better are cooking to share, helping others (like on the forums), gardening, listening to music, crochet or other craft activity, reading, going to the beach for a walk or just to sit in the elements, learning to play bridge, and writing.  

Re: what’s in your tool box ?

@BlueBay  Great thread. My dog is a huge toolbox help. A shower has to come high on my list, crafts when I can, and nature, I love listening to birds, water when I can get near a river.

Re: what’s in your tool box?

Hi @BlueBay 


I don't have a coping box or anything like it - I have the things most people have like colouring books and music - and I play the piano which is great


This week I have had an abundance of stress and although having to work out the stress often with my headaching and my stomach churning was repetitive and rather boring - it did work and was worth the effort


The migraine stayed but the stress eased


So I sit in a chair and write what's bothering me all over a sheet of paper then then shut my eyes and massage my arms and shoulders and legs without moving too much and ease it out and tease it out - it takes time esp when the stress is due to uncertainty and most people know this - I'm not solving anything while I rock gently


But after I saw my doctor and had something for the migraine I found the stress had dropped a lot. I think stress manifests itself in different ways for different people - we all have to deal with it at some times in our lives


I learned this in the past - a long time ago - I don't think anything I was taught or read about - rather it is a combination of things I have found helpful - 


I hope you find something that works for you 


And people have made brillliant suggestions here - worth book-marking this thread



Re: what’s in your tool box?

@BlueBay  I feel that too at times, lack of motivation.  Things even look different, sometimes seems like I wear a vale when symptoms are bad then when I improve, its like the world returns in technicolour.

The main thing that living with this has taught me is that I need to forgive myself and just let myself recover afterwards.  I am broken but I have people who love me and support me when i crack so its not all bad.  Its just drawn that way sometimes.  There are little pockets of happiness and they are what makes you keep going.

Re: what’s in your tool box?

Hi @LadyCaroline  I don't think we've met.  Great that you found this thread.  There's another one called Coping Box  that has some great stuff in it too.   Hopefully some of the things in there will help you feel more motivated.

I really understand about the feeling one is wearing a veil - I've had that a lot too.  I've read in some mystic thing somewhere that 'the woman unveiled' is very brave, loving, and authentic - nice to be reminded of that.

Self-forgiveness is an amazing quality to have and so important in our recovery journey.  There's a post in Useful Resources called Recovery Model  that you might find interesting.

So positive to think about 'little pockets of happiness'.  Another one is 'random acts of kindness' - I experienced one of these a few days ago and it was lovely.

Look forward to seeing you around a bit more - I'm often on the A long rave  thread if you want to join in there some time.

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