Lived Experience Forum

[aficionado]

@BryanaCamp 

Thanks for your response, it means a lot!

I just spoke to my psychologist, and she says that I should just accept that this job isn't for me, and find something else. She also said that a job like this (where talking to strangers over the phone is a huge part of the job) may not be ideal for someone like me, who has always had problems with social skills in general. She gave me the example of how it wouldn't be wise for someone who doesn't know how to swim, to dive directly into the deep end of the pool and try to learn. Instead, he should first learn at the shallow end. Similarly, she said it isn't that I am not capable of doing these jobs, but I need to improve my social skills significantly before I am ready for such jobs. She also told me that disability employment providers are supposed to find me another job if I can't handle a current job, and that isn't really grounds for blacklisting me.

I hope you don't have to deal with this nasty colleague too often. I completely understand how bad it can get.

I do have some coping mechanisms as you said, but I have always been a bit slow. If someone says something, I need like half a second to process that information before responding. But in this job, it is necessary to be able to respond instantly to people. I can't think so fast.

You remembered right, I am a student! I am done with my first term (my university follows the trimester system), and my second term is starting on Monday, the 3rd of June. Things are going pretty well on that front. I didn't really make friends or get social in Term 1, because I was so busy looking for a job. I am going to change that in Term 2, and try to interact more with my fellow students.

[Ali11]

Hope the appointment went well @aficionado 

[Matt12]

Hi

I get it, never have doubts about your ability to ever work again as clearly you have a lot to offer. I have changed roles many times over the years for the right and wrong reasons.

Making money counts as bills need to be paid, look for options "which is a lot of work" then do it, remember Life is a compromise and never "even" at the best of times.

Breath, assess and make an informed choice

[aficionado]

@Matt12 

Thank you!

[BryanaCamp]

morning @aficionado 

your psychologist sounds terrific & knowledgeable, well done on finding her. Hope you feel better since your appointment with her. Sounds like your disability support service is obliged to find you more suitable work.

Of course you can improve you social skills, I agree with your psychologist, you just have to start at the shallow end and take it slowly. I went to heaps of Meetups & made lots of mistakes before I started to build friendships but it did happen. Even though your recent work experience was very painful, you may have improved your conversation skills without knowing it.

I'm glad you've enjoyed uni this year. It's a great idea to try to be a bit more social in the next term. You're a very bright & likable person & have a lot to offer, I'm sure people would enjoy your company.

Hope you're feeling better today & have a relaxing Sunday.

[aficionado]

@BryanaCamp 

Yes indeed, she has helped me a lot over the last couple of years. She often gives me sound advice and coping tips.

As for socialising, I am already taking steps towards that. My second term at the university is starting tomorrow, and I have signed up for the 'Speedfriending' event organised by the student community. I have also purchased a ticket for the 'Back to university' student party on Thursday. I have never done these things before, and I am quite nervous. But it is still better than interacting with strangers at my job. And I might actually end up with a friend or two, provided they don't catch on to my mental illness and don't judge me.

Thanks again for your kind words! And the description of your experience with socialising is really inspiring for me, and gives me hope that I will eventually succeed at it some day.

My sunday was indeed relaxing, but I went through pretty bad maigraine for most of the day. Hope your day was better!