Friends, Family & Carers Forum

[rosey]

They all have there own families to be with. I’m now the tocken single of my friends. I don’t want him to hurt but I do if that makes sense. No idea how I am going to get through tomorrow. I feel I’m being horrible to my family but with out him I just want to sleep right through it.

Any suggestions? How are you all getting through this time of year.

[Faith-and-Hope]

I am getting though by doing things for my family @rosey ..... just knocking off a hit-list of preparations for tomorrow, but it’s the easiest home Christmas I have ever done. I am cooking because I enjoy it, and chose things that I want to make instead of worrying about who eats what ..... apart from one general every day salad for them and an all-my-favourite-things-in-a-salad for me ..... every other year it has been about everyone else, cos that’s how I am ..... but not this year ..... this year is a self-care Christmas for me.

Can you list 10 things for yourself, and do them, like it or not.

Paint your nails. Just do it. Make them look like Christmas. Different colours each finger if you like.

Choose something to wear that is all about you, and nothing about anyone else ..... your favourite T-shirt, favourite jeans, favourite skirt ..... whatever it is.

Make yourself something special to drink.

Wear a favourite piece of jewellery ..... or have an arm-party by wearing every bracelet you own .....

Red lipstick !

Paint your toenails.

Draw a flower around your naval.

Eat dinner with chopsticks, or something like them .... a pair of bamboo skewers if that’s what tou’ve got.

Put on some music.

Do something crazy with your hair ...... look up hairstyles on line and trade it up to look scary ..... anything different from how you usually wear it .....

Make paper flowers from setviettes, or kitchen towel, or tissues, or toilet paper, whatever, and spray them with perfume (just a little so they don’t go soggy .....

Don’t ...... just lay there in a heap thinking that you can’t function without him. He left you, right ? Be your own best friend and pick yourself up with self-care stuff so that you remember the night before Christmas was about you ..... and Christmas was about you .... and Boxing Day was about you ..... and then you can fall into a heap if you want to, but only for three days.

You’re the token single of your friends ? Show them how it’s done ❣️

[dands26]

I spent Christmas eve technology free playing cards and board games with my parents and step sisters.
Make the best of a bad situation.
My mr. Is considering popping in tomorrow after work. All i hope is if he does my brother isnt in a drunken state and says anything to upset him.
My brothers are over protective..

I wrapped presents because i like to give gifts

I baked because thats my domain and i enjoy it

[Faith-and-Hope]

Merry Christmas from me @rosey ..... will be thinking of you tonnorrow .... bear up Hon as best you can ..... try not to let him have more than he has already taken.

Merry Christmas @dands26 ....

🎄❤️🌟

[rosey]

Thanks all @Faith-and-Hope @dands26 they are helpful.
It’s just me my parent and my grandparents (my grandmother has onset dimentia so it’s going to be hard) it’s also the first with out my mother in law who I found in her home in jan and the first without my grandfather who passed in sept. Overall not the greatest year to be having a merry Christmas of it all but I’ll try your pointers and go from there

Merry Christmas to you both. Thanks you for your support and words. Hope you can have a special day tomorrow.

X

[dands26]

@rosey
How are you?
How is everything going?

[rosey]

hi @dands26

how are you going?

I got really ill over the break so spent a lot in bed. Nothing to report on the ex front. Still pretty much the same but I think I need to make it 100% official and ask for no contact for a significant amount of time. Christmas was hard and he didn't make any effort even a Merry Christamas and from all reports he is fine and happy so not mch more to be doen I guess.

This weekend was the anniversary of his mother death (1yr) and he seems to be doing fine while I'm a mess. I need to keep my distance. I had planned to but I keep having to see him, even bumping into him. I'm doing my best to aviod him (honestly) but it's like the universe has other ideas. House settles in a few weeks so besides the dogs I should be able to reduce contact. TBH how I'm feeling right now I want him out of my life completely. I realised I had him on this pedalstal and he didn't deserve to be. Acknowledging this though still hasnt taken the pain away.

Ive been on new anti Ds for just over 2 weeks but they are making me so nauseaus and I thought I was doing better but this week I've been struggling again. I know its a rollercoaster but I dont think these are the ones for me. Back to the Drs.

How was your christmas/NYs?

How have you been doing?